Act I: Soylent dumplings make you young. I'll have to wait until a Supreme Court decision comes down before I can definitively call them "soylent." Grossed us out with its gyno-corporeal Cronenbergisms and bloody bathtub water, but way too conventional when stacked up against the next two. Watch as Bai Ling picks her nose. We spotted the plot turns a mile away.
Act II: Ok, Fruit Chan was lame. This Oldboy cat is the real deal. Fingers in a blender. Vampire girl in the opening scene. Unbelievably great set design. Hurtful and nasty confessions. I didn't get the ending. Probably requires a second viewing.
Act III: Miike gives us some Taboo shit. [Wince] Speechless. Nothing funny to say.
Except this: remember when I saw the Three...Extremes trailer? It was after this. I was not on my A-game that day.